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Saturday, June 22, 2002
Friday and Saturday

The days keep pushing forward and I find it amazing. How is it that the sun can keep rising and papers be delivered and lawns get mowed and groceries be purchased? How is it that everything hasn’t stopped? Why haven’t I stopped?

The permanence of it all is finally settling in. Since I received that phone call in Kinsale, I’ve dreamed of my father every night. In each dream he’s been alive, but in varying stages of illness. Last night I dreamed he was close to the end. It’s as though each evening I’m being prepared for the new horror of the resulting waking hours, the slow realization that this is it. He’s not coming home ever again. He’ll never laugh with me again, he’ll never hug me again, we’ll never share a meal together or watch a Chaplin film. We’ll never tag team my mother with an inside joke and I’ll never ever be able to tell him I love him again.

It’s over, but I’m not ready yet. I’m just not ready.

Hula left for home yesterday morning and I’ve booked a flight for myself tomorrow. My brother will be around for the next few days as he lives close by, and then my mother will leave for Vermont to visit with family there. Much like the day of the funeral when I couldn’t bear to close my eyes and have it be over, a memory, I don’t want this visit to end. I’m clinging to it in a futile attempt to cling to him. It makes no sense, I know. But I have no idea how to do this.

When mother left me alone in the house for the first time as she ran an errand, I opened his closet door and hugged all of his flannel shirts.

Almay’s Amazing Lash Waterproof mascara really is waterproof.

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